Sunday, March 17, 2013

Suicide!!!! You will be missed.

 
Psalms 3:13 Look at me! Answer me, O LORD my God! Revive me, or else I will die!

******   I know an odd title for an inspirational blog but hang in there with me.******
 


My Great Aunt Jametta who is still alive and kicking at 80 plus years  is one of the friendships that I cherish so much as an adult.  One great thing for me about getting older is that my relationships with my relatives changed from being my baby sitter when I was a kid, a chaperone/driver when I was a teen, to now  as a an adult with a child of my own, into a deep wonderful friendship .  The first time my aunt  cursed on the phone while we were talking tripped me out, I almost dropped the phone.  One she’s not one to curse (unless you take her parking space or get in her way on one of her many senior trip adventures) and second (clutching my pearls) my sweet bread pudding making aunt  just swore!
Of course cursing is not  the defining moment in a  deeper relationship, but my  point is she looked at me not as her little niece but as a friend and a confidant as she expressed herself.  And when I say friendship,  Aunt Jametta and I talk at least once a week, if not more.   She and I laugh about tv shows, funny things that happened at the senior living center she lives at (and let me tell you they should have their own reality show), sometimes we even talk about men.      One day she sort of caught me off guard though.  My Aunt , my sister girl, my ace was telling me about making sure her will was in order and that she had paid off  her plot at the cemetery.  Let me clear up any confusion right now Aunt Jametta wasn’t thinking about committing suicide or anything like that.  She is beautiful and in great health, but as she reminded me - "Child I am old I won’t live forever."  You will i have anything to do with it I wanted to scream.  But all and all I made a joke about her final resting place being across the road from her already passed husband and she said, "He can look but he bet not cross that road." 

My heart did sink a little that day though.  This beautiful woman filled every memory I have in my life.  The world without her will be so different.  My Aunt Jametta is our Oprah when it comes to gift giving.  But instead of diamonds and high dollar items she blesses us with some of the most unique gifts you would ever expect to pull out of your Aunt Jametta Christmas bag.  There may be the old reliable gift of new socks (usually the ones with the individual toe spaces), but guaranteed there is going to be a cabbage in there, a pencil shaped like a duck, a am/fm walkman radio shaped like a bear.    My bag always has something a little more unique then the other bags she hands out to her children, grandchilrdren, nieces and nephews (but I’m her favorite, at least in my mind).  I even chuckled at the time she got about 50 lbs of Jelly beans  donated to her (she use to take care of children) She froze them (she is the freeze master!)and we ate Jelly beans for over a year it was crazy.

I don’t know why thinking of her made me think on folks who are ready to depart this world, but here we are.  The thought  of all the memories with her drifted into thoughts of those who want to commit suicide.  The people who in one way or another feel that they are not needed on this planet any longer.  Trust me there is someone out there who will think back and reflect on on a memory of you and the empty place that you have now left.  The place that only you could fill. 

v  Maybe you are the friend who always gives it to them straight

v  Maybe you are the neighbor who always smiles

v  Maybe you’re the person who let me get in front of you on a busy traffic day

v  Maybe you’re one of the people who read my blog, symbolized just by a number, but your number moved my soul when my views went from two to three!

  The point you might not (sadly) mean something to the people you feel you should mean something too, but you mean something to someone You are important You are so important.  I don’t know anything about how you can find your purpose LOL (laugh out Loud) I read the “Purpose Driven Life,” and I will confess – I didn’t get it.  I wanted that last page to say “Senetra your purpose is…”  And I wish I could stop whatever pain or depression you are in.  I can ask you to pray and I will pray too.  But I demand that you know you are necessary you are important  there is no smile like yours there is no gift like yours – Hope this helps you hold on!  You are loved and you will be missed!

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